Forgiveness

It takes a lot to forgive someone. It doesn’t matter what that person did, but what you feel in your heart. Forgiveness is often misunderstood. Some people claim others ask for forgiveness to condone what they have done or get self-satisfaction in their wrong doings. Nothing could be further from the truth. You should forgive someone for yourself, not for them. Forgiveness isn’t done because you are weak or because you are someone who lets others walk all over you. You do it because you are showing mercy. You do it because it reduces the urge to get revenge on someone or punish them. You do it because you want to let go of the anger in your heart towards whatever wrong was done to you. You let go of the situation because you do not want it to consume your life. Forgiveness heals you more than it does the person who has wronged you.

It takes a lot of love and joy in someone’s heart to forgive someone who has wronged them. If you hold onto anger, it soon gets a hold on you. It takes over. Anger is more like a virus than an emotion. Anger consumes you. Everything you do, you want to punish the person who has wronged you.

Forgiving someone doesn’t mean you’re someone who can be walked on. It doesn’t mean you are weak. It doesn’t mean you are a coward and “just don’t want to fight about it because you know you can’t win”. Forgiving someone doesn’t mean that you have to see them again after the situation is recosiled. It doesn’t mean that you have to forget what they did to you or put yourself in a place where it can be done again. Forgiveness means you’re not thinking about it all the time. It means your life is not consumed by anger or hatred. It means that you are not going to seek out revenge for whatever that person has done to you. It means just what it means: Letting go. Moving on.

It’s not always easy to forgive and move on. You may need to cry. You may need to vent. You may need to talk to a doctor. I have experienced someone wronging me and I have forgiven them. All of them. I am ready to move on. Don Henley said it best when he said:

“There are people in your life whove come and gone
They let you down you know they hurt your pride
You better put it all behind you baby; life goes on
You keep carryin that anger; itll eat you up inside, baby“

I feel the same way: I forgive you. Even if you don’t love me anymore. =)

Darren Hayes has a good song about forgiveness, too. But I don’t think he really “let it go” in that song and it was more of “here’s a cream pie, let me smash it in your face!” type of thing.

If you’re too lazy to go through YouTube and look for those videos, I’ve done the work for you here.

Don Henley:

Darren Hayes:

If you have iTunes, go buy those songs! If you don’t, go to a store and buy the CDs. Play them often. Especially if you want someone to forgive you, or you need to forgive them.

I know there are people out there I need to forgive. Some of them will see this. Some of them won’t. But I forgive you. I don’t expect reciprocation, but I want you to know that I forgive you. I can let it go. I can put it behind me, and I don’t hate you. You know who you are. Just please, please, please don’t tell me if this entry made you cry. I can’t stand it when I make people cry. So smile! I insist! It’s the rules around here!!!

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