While I was helping re-program Dennis’ phone tonight (we found his old phone from 2003 and we’re putting his contacts that still work over to the new one), I got chatting up with his guitarist. I remember I mentioned that I was glad that this cell phone number leak wasn’t my fault. I’ve done some stupid things in my life, but I would never give out others’ private cell phone numbers online. The guitarist commented on that. “Just be careful who you’re friends with online. Those people aren’t your friends, you know.” That last line has stuck with me for a while. Normally I don’t remember things like that so vividly, but this time, I have. I think about it when I think of things that have happened in the past. I think of it when I’m tying things in with what I’ve recently done. Like when one of the people who e-hates me and basically cuts down everything that I have said online got together with me on a message board, we were the best of friends. She had no idea who I was.

I wonder about the web sometimes. I try not to do it too often because more than not, it’s my window to the world. Stuck inside, with this medication rolling through me, I rarely have the opportunity to get out and do things, let alone go places. I frequently have to rest when I’m out and about. It just isn’t right. Then there are the days when I come across people who just want to make my life harder. I don’t understand their motives. Are they jealous of me? Jealous of the fact that I don’t have to get up every day and go to work or force my husband out the door? Are they jealous that he loves me and takes good care of me and our children? Are they jealous that he took care of himself enough so he has the funds to financially care for his family? I’d trade all our money to have good health. I’d trade all my possessions to be able to take a long walk with my kids. Some people think that you can only be rich if you have a lot of money or expensive things. That’s untrue. The true definition of being rich? To have a soul that shines. My soul can’t shine because of my weak body. I will shine one day, though. Maybe not today, but one day.